i spent the day with thadea, one of my closest friends. i find it nice that even after having not seen each other for while, we can start a conversation as if we never stopped talking. it’s a natural flow, and that’s when you know you’ve got it right.
below: a pretty old photo of us taken at a sleep over at nicky’s.
high school security guards all seem to hate me for some reason. their eyes follow my every step and any sense of subtlety is thrown out the window; i’m instantly incriminated and automatically antagonized. i don’t get it though; it’s not as if i come off as any sort of threat whatsoever. do i just reek of mischief and mayhem?
i hate how people like that tend to abuse the little power they are given. once, when i was visiting another school, i had a security guard follow me as i walked around. he purposely waited for when i arrived at a place filled with people before he stopped me and began his power-hungry rant. i told him i was going to the office and he yelled at me to shut up.
any semblance of authority goes to their heads. i mean, you’re a high school security guard; does it give you some sense of pride and satisfaction to bully passing students?
it’s especially bad with ttc employees. they can be such a pain in the ass. i mean, fine, i don’t have my student card, but i’m in my school uniform and definitely look under eighteen. it sucks that i look too young to buy a beer but bitchy ttc employees won’t let me use a student ticket so i’m left stranded in the middle of a huge city. have they no hearts or sense of compassion? i guess if i were stuck in a booth behind a pane of glass all day, i’d find any excuse to yell at anyone too; it would just make things more interesting.
“can i have three adult tickets please?”
“WHAT KIND OF A NUMBER IS THREE? WHY NOT GET FIVE OR TEN OR TWENTY, LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE?”
“sir, may i have my change?”
“CHANGE? GREAT IDEA. FIRST, CHANGE YOUR HAIRSTYLE. THEN YOUR CLOTHES. AND THEN YOUR FACE.”
i also bumped into ruth, who i haven’t seen in the longest time. i’ve always had some sort of deeply set respect for her. she carries a sense of self, knowing and authority without coming across as a huge bitch. there are always those friends you wish you talked to more, or hung out with more and ruth is one of those friends. we drifted over topics of love and life and other such trivial things for fifteen minutes before she had to leave for class.
headed off to lysistrata after all the hanging out. i feel like such an awful actor in that play, but there’s a reason i’m so pissy during rehearsals; come showtime, let’s hope i can actually stick to my character. but what is my character? am i a diligent, obedient and stern soldier or a fearful, reluctant coward? i should probably ask my director these things.
maybe i should brush up on my acting skills? i’ll go over a bunch of monologues tonight and try to make myself cry.