it’s really funny how even though there seems to be a general agreement that toxic masculinity must be destroyed, whenever a hetero man dares to go against it y’all are SO quick to bombard him “gay but in the closet” and subject him to all kinds of weird ass fantasies, generalizations and stereotypes. ya’ll want the world to believe you understand that gender is a social construct, gender performance does not correlate with sex and sexuality is a spectrum rather than a static set of options, yet simultatenously you still act according to the concepts you claim to denounce. You still contribute to an environment that is hostile towards being comfortable with sexuality and gender. You still contribute to an environment where something right between the far sides of the sexual spectrum like bisexuality is cloaked in stigma. And ironically this makes gay men agents of toxic masculinity just as much as zealous straight men are. The sheer hypocrisy of it all is so gross – you demand acceptance of all sexualities yet also hostilize sexual comfort & freedom. I know there will always be people who are naturally resistant to generalizations and assumptions because thankfully they’re very comfortable with who and what they are. But if y’all stopped objectifying, sexualizing and fetishizing anyone not fitting into the straitjacket of sexuality & gender performance there would be so much MORE people that would find peace with themselves. And this includes making jokes or “lighthearted” memes about them. Even though they seem pretty harmless they’re still bricks in a system of prejudices and preconceptions. If u truly want to achieve actual sexual freedom for everyone, stop agressively projecting yourself & your sexual outlet onto others.
this is what goes on in my head whenever someone tells me someone’s “probably in the closet” or “hasn’t come out to himself yet.”