i started reading “hooked” by asako yuzuki (her follow-up to “butter”, which i loved) and it’s inspired me to start blogging again. one of the characters is a kind of bored housewife running a blog detailing the minutiae of her everyday life, and as i was reading, i remembered a bygone era when i compulsively noted things down – made the most mundane things ever so slightly more beautiful and wonderful by a nice turn of phrase.

it’s 1am now. i stupidly decided to take a “20-minute power nap” after getting drowsy while doing a daily Bible study. the nap lasted two hours and i woke up to pee and now i can’t get back to sleep. so i’m reminiscing on being sixteen and in high school, staying up late doing nothing, listening to music and writing down all my teenage heartaches and wonderings, making the world so big and pulling little bits of magic from the day.

often, i’d be listening to the xx’s debut album, lying moody in my bed. now i’m listening to “end of august” off of noah kahan’s new album, “the great divide.”

And I follow New York plates to the county line
I ignore ‘em when they wave on 89

Late August angst and a pointless night
Oh, and the feelin’ of being alive
For the first time in a long time

lyrics like this, and the rising melody, the keys driving the rhythm of the song – such a specific way of feeling alive at this time of night, all by myself in a quiet room, somewhere in the big city.

life expands, and i don’t feel so alone, and i want to pull magic from the everyday again. i want to be able to look back and remember the little things, the sways in moods, the small heartbreaks and little victories.

let’s see if i can keep it up, this practice of future-proofing my own remembering.