me: huh. he’s kind of cute, i guess.
jasper: is he your next victim?
me: i resent that.
jasper: i mean…target?
me: …
jasper: …
me: that’s not much better.
jasper: i really meant victim.
Tag: dialogue
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fickle hearts and fast tongues.
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a conversation at the grown-ups’ table as imagined at the kids’ table.
MOM: Pass the wine, please. I want to become crazy.
DAD: Okay.
GRANDMOTHER: Did you see the politics? It made me angry.
DAD: Me too. When it was over, I had sex.
UNCLE: I’m having sex right now.
DAD: We all are.
MOM: Let’s talk about which kid I like the best.
DAD (laughing): You know, but you won’t tell.
MOM: If they ask me again, I might tell.
FRIEND FROM WORK: Hey, guess what? My voice is pretty loud!
DAD (laughing): there are actual monsters in the world, but when my kids ask I pretend like there aren’t.
MOM: I’m angry! I’m angry all of a sudden!
DAD: I’m angry too! We’re angry at each other!
MOM: Now everything is fine.
DAD: We just saw the PG-13 movie. It was so good.
MOM: There was a big sex.
FRIEND FROM WORK: I am the loudest! I am the loudest!
(Everybody laughs.)
MOM: I had a lot of wine, and now I’m crazy!
GRANDFATHER: Hey, do you guys know what God looks like?
ALL: Yes.
GRANDFATHER: Don’t tell the kids.
(from ‘Ant Farm’ by Simon Rich)
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dialogue #9
she-demon: when you’re beautiful and intelligent, you get too bored too easily.
me: is that what’s happening to me?
she-demon: no. you’re just stupid.
me: oh…
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dialogue #6
charlie: i wouldn’t mind it if you were too demanding. everything else about you makes you a keeper.
me: what? no. NO.
charlie: what? i just complimented you.
me: NO. I’M DEFINITELY A SEEKER.
charlie: what? what’s going on?
me: YOU DON’T GET IT. YOU JUST DON’T GET IT.
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dialogue #5
on my way home from play rehearsal…
sketchball: you’re beautiful.
me: thanks.
sketchball: am i beautiful?
me: look, are you merely hunting for a compliment which you hope leads to some sort of sexual encounter or would you like me to actually treat that question philosophically and delve deeper into the complex world of aesthetics?
sketchball: what?what would happen if i started applying mr. dick’s lessons to the real world.
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watching clash of the titans.
io: this is pegasus.
me: it’s big and black.
io: no man has ever ridden him before.
thadea: i bet he hasn’t.and then we all giggle.
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dialogue #4
elaha: why do you take pleasure in my misery?
me: you’re loving life, don’t even lie to yourself
elaha: do you feed on my tears? i feel like you feed on my tears.
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dialogue #3
– [c=#5BB7E3] кєιιч иgυчєи [/c] says:
she has a big house
and he told me to have a party at HER house
cuz no rents
083D; Icarus says:
i’m going to trash it.
harharhar
shhh don’t tell
– [c=#5BB7E3] кєιιч иgυчєи [/c] says:
there isn’t gonna be a lot of poeople though
083D; Icarus says:
GOODBYE LAMPS
– [c=#5BB7E3] кєιιч иgυчєи [/c] says:
so i dunno, it might be awkward
it’s kinda like a small gathering?
like, less then 10 people
083D; Icarus says:
EW
I’M NOT GOING
TRASH SOME LAMPS FOR ME
– [c=#5BB7E3] кєιιч иgυчєи [/c] says:
LOL I’LL TRY
083D; Icarus says:
that’s all i’m asking for
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dialogue #2
083D; Icarus says:
cool
you should totally get me a doughnut right now.
LALALA♪; says:
IT’S LIKE 11PM
YOU ARE KRAZY
083D; Icarus says:
‘time’ is just society imposing its rules on you again
LALALA♪; says:
omggg
is that why i hate time?
083D; Icarus says:
yeah
